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🌶️ “Faux-sea Fabulous” Gumbo Soup
“It’s gumbo with attitude, because sometimes you fake the seafood, but never the flavor.”

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🐟 Ingredients (Serves 6 hungry jazz fans)
The Base (aka the roux that’s wooing everyone):
• ¼ cup vegetable oil
• ¼ cup all-purpose flour
The Flavor Parade:
• 1 medium onion, diced
• 1 green bell pepper, diced
• 2 celery stalks, chopped
• 3 garlic cloves, minced
• 1 beef sausage link (about 10 oz), sliced (smoked is best)
• 1½ cups imitation crab or shrimp, chopped
• 6 cups chicken or veggie broth
• 1 tbsp Cajun seasoning
• ½ tsp thyme
• 2 bay leaves
• 1 tsp paprika
• Salt & pepper to taste
• 1 tsp hot sauce (or more, if your tastebuds like to party)
Add-ins:
• 1 cup cooked white or brown rice (optional, for added heartiness)
• 2 green onions, sliced (for that final zing)
Joke break:
Why did the imitation crab get invited to the gumbo party?
*Because it always brings shell-tertainment!

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🔥 Instructions

1. Make the roux: In a large pot, heat the oil over medium heat. Stir in the flour and keep it moving, like you’re dancing with danger. Stir for about 10–12 minutes, until it turns a rich caramel brown (the color of a Southern sunset and sass combined).
   🥄 Don’t walk away. Roux is clingy and burns faster than gossip in a group chat.
2. Add the onion, bell pepper, celery, and garlic. Sauté 5–7 minutes until soft and smelling like home.
3. Toss in the beef sausage and cook for 3–4 minutes until it gets that smoky, sizzling edge.
4. Pour in the broth and stir in your spices: Cajun seasoning, thyme, bay leaves, paprika, salt, pepper, and hot sauce. Let it simmer for 20 minutes to develop those “deep in the soul” vibes.
5. Add the imitation seafood and let it simmer another 10 minutes. The flavors will blend like a brass band on Bourbon Street.
6. Optional: Stir in cooked rice or ladle the soup over it in bowls, your gumbo, your groove.
7. Top with green onions, serve hot, and prepare to be asked for seconds… and possibly a jazz playlist.
   Joke break:
   What do you call seafood that pretends to be something it’s not?
   A shell-ebrity in disguise.

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🍛 Why This Gumbo Slaps
• All the deep, rich flavor of traditional gumbo, minus the shellfish drama
• Smoky sausage + spicy broth = a love story in a bowl
• Imitation seafood = budget-friendly, still fancy
• Perfect for cold nights, hangovers, or impressing that friend who “doesn’t even like soup” (until now)

Final punchline:
Why don’t gumbo and drama mix?
Because gumbo already brings the heat, no extra spice needed!